Dating the Devil

In college I dated a Catholic man. When we started dating I told him that I was not a believer. He, at first, was fine with this. He was more curious about it than anything else. The fact that I grew up Christian and he grew up Catholic was enough of a difference. We would have conversations about our personal religious experiences and how our religions differed. It was interesting...at first.

Once his very religious family became involved in the relationship it all went to hell.

His parents were also very curious of me in the beginning. They would ask me about my morals and how my own family thought of my non-belief. More of their inquires were curious in nature than vicious.

That didn't last long.

About 6 months into the relationship they began asking me about my long-term goals. They wanted to know if I wanted to get married and start a family. They wanted to know how a non-believer COULD be married and successfully raise children. They wanted to know how I COULD live my life without a deity.

They began telling my then-boyfriend about how I would lead him down the road to hell. I was not a good match for him. I was surely after his money (all $300 of it). They began to tell him how people like me could not be trusted. They told him how if he married me they would disown him.

He believed them.

(Sidebar: He wasn't a very nice man so I'm better off anyway.)

At the time I thought that things like this were normal. There are a million stories about people who hate their in-laws. But, I think it is somehow worse when religion is mixed in.

For an atheist, at least in my experience, it is much easier to be involved with someone who is also a non-believer. And it's sad that this is a true statement. To me a relationship that is ruined by a god is like having your relationship ruined by Santa Clause.

You spend all your time with this person. They are real. The issues and happy days you share and experience are real. The struggles and pain you go through together are real. For it to be killed by a bronze-aged, middle eastern idea is a baffling thing to have to wrap your head around.

It sucks.